while having too much fun killing my car yesterday, i must have been found by something that is not a friend of mine- an allergy. my arm was itching and i had an odd rash. it went away during the afternoon hours, but came back last night. i have to wait for my goodnight phonecall before i sleep. most of the time, even if i'm tired, i just can't really sleep until i get the call. and after the call i sleep like a baby. anyway, last night i had to take some benedryl about 12ish. i really don't like to take many meds at all, and i really have a dislike of benedryl these days. (i used to love it. used it as a sleeping aid when jess and i lived about the bar...) i took the benedryl because i knew that i wouldn't be able to sleep and i'd just sit up and itch. i wish i hadn't taken the benedryl because that stuff knocks me out. and keeps me knocked out. needless to say, i was fighting to tell ben goodnight when i got the phonecall. plus i slept through the cell phone alarm this morning, which i never do. (i'm the world's lightest sleeper.) sleeping through the alarm meant that i missed sunday school, and that did not make me very happy at all.
i did make it to church. with it being disciple now weekend, the abundance of youth was amazing. i'm always happy to see this. it's funny though, because i think of myself and my church history, and i think i should share some of that. when i was a child, we did not go to church. the only times i remember going is for Easter or Christmas (if that) and it was normally with a grandparent or great-grandparent. don't take that statement the wrong way. my parents are religious. i'm unsure why we never went to church, but as a child i didn't ask that question. anyway, the first 18 years of my life had very few church experiences. things started to change for me in that year. i got the boot from my house (don't ask; just leave it at that), and i went to live with the melton's (hi rach!). we started going to church and i really enjoyed it. at 19, i was baptised at bethel baptist in caseyville (my hometown). that was a really great feeling. the october after i turned 19, i moved back home with my parents and started working 2 jobs, including sundays. this created a lax in church attendance in my life. i now have a job where i don't have to work weekends (which is really nice). so i can begin attending church regularly again. it's a good step for me and something i've been wanting to do. (man, i'm so glad i stayed at bjc full-time and turned down that walgreens job...)
i'm excited to see where God is leading me to next. and i'm normally not a follower, but wherever i'm led by Him i'm sure i'll follow then.
i bring this point up (about going back to church and not going as a child) because of a point josh brought up tonight at youth service. i believe the statistic he threw out was that after graduating high school, 87% of students do not continue going to church. that statistic alone is disturbing. but it bothers me further. let me explain.
i have a fantastic life that just keeps getting better. i firmly believe that's because of many things; this includes my intelligence, my happiness, my willingness to take care of myself when needed, and my faith. i thought high school was hard. but boy were my late teens to early twenties even more stressful. there are days (like today) when i'm hit with a lot. and at times it can feel like i want to throw in the towel, but i never do. i end up just saying things like "this is in God's hands, not mine. it's His reason." (i know some of you have heard that a lot from me lately.) i really belive that. sometimes i don't even want to know the reason; i just want to know in my heart that i have the faith that there is a reason.
that was a little rant, but i had to get it out. moral of the story is that the statistic is crazy. that's the time in your life when you especially need to worship and pray; moreso than the previous 18 years, in most cases.
back to my day.
after church i got to come back to the house and take a nap. i almost tried to skip the nap because there was an illini-purdue game on (which the illini won!!!!!). i eventually decided the nap was a better idea.
after my nap i had the pleasure of attending josh's youth group service, some of which i spoke of above. in addition, i'd like to say that josh is a great speaker (hey, we all know he likes to talk). his lesson hit home tonight as well. so a big BIG thanks to josh for freely opening himself and his church up to a silly girl like me.
then it was trivia for a short while. we didn't stay as long as normal, but i'm glad to be home and enjoying my ben fold's live cd over and over again.
on another note, when i got home my roommate told me we'd have to be out of our current place probably by the first of april. i have mixed emotions on this...
here's a shot of roma, josh, and myself at josh and colleen's wedding. it was fun shenannigans. notice my eyes, as i had been crying for quite some time. and i rarely cry at weddings, but this one was funny and cute and josh was so happy that it made this girl cry.
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